How the day went down

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 Things were good. Didn't go for a walk today but it was a beautiful evening. V came home. I lit some candles because I wanted him to experience what I experience at the end of the day. I realise that I would need chairs or something if I have to entertain people. But we talked. 

I realise that I was holding it against him for not coming to meet me after Ma passed on. We spoke about it. I don't know if I am over it. Hopefully in time. I know that the kind of freedom I want...the kind of freedom I really want...forgiving and letting go is a very crucial part of it. V is a good guy. He just didn't think that I would want something like that. I am so tired of feeling let down or feeling guilty for letting people down. 

Anyway, my heart feels heavy now. But it was a good evening with lots of stories. 

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