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I pray

I pray for strength to get past fury when people judge my actions out of context and criticize me.

Or worse, when they advise me.

I pray for strength to believe in the truth I have lived by.

I pray that I do not let other people's estimation of my character or my capacity to love hurt me.

I pray that I do not get judgmental of people, especially when they too speak out of ignorance, pain, or despair. As I have.

I pray that I am strong enough to get through a difficult marriage and still cherish the good moments I had.

I pray that I take care of my parents as unflinchingly as they have taken care of me.

I wish that I can get past the guilt that I have put them through so much trouble, and yet they are always, always there for me. And they are always, always smiling.

I pray that I never forget to appreciate this force of life that has given me so much. A family that will stand by me, no matter what. Friends who won't ask questions before they offer their shoulders to weep on. Colleagues who have shown the kind of compassion I hadn't expected from strangers.

I pray that I never lose the will to travel or write or try something new.

I pray that I don't hold it against people when they don't believe my side of the story. When stories get personal, biases are a given. Sometimes, even the most blatant sequence of events can be interpreted in various ways.

I pray that I never, ever behave like the people who make me angry.

I pray that I have the strength to keep silent when lashing out is tempting.

I pray that I understand the difference between ego and dignity.

I pray that I have the strength to pick my battles well. And having picked them, fight fair to the finish.

I pray for peace. For myself, for everyone. An agitated mind is an ugly mind.

I pray that I am a strong, happy parent to my daughter.

I pray that I can sing in the rain, again.

I pray that I can sleep through a night again.

I pray, with all my heart, to look forward to a tomorrow again.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Amen and God bless you.
Anonymous said…
I hope all your prayers come true...
Anonymous said…
all the best to you. take care
Unknown said…
i pray that your prayers are heard today ... :)
Anonymous said…
My prayers are with you. All the best to you. I pray that you soon find inner peace. Its a passing phase and I'm sure you will come out with flying colors.

-Lakshmi
Anonymous said…
Sincerely hope all ur prayers come true. No matter what, ur this friend will always be with you.

-pk
Puneet said…
I pray that you never lose the zest that i can feel in your blogs. All the Best!
Anonymous said…
I hope and pray that may the best happen for you....But I suggest marriage is something we should give time and patience.Whatever I have known of you from your blogs I know you are not a quitter.
Anonymous said…
I agree with anon's comment,"marriage is something we should give time and patience." Everything will be fine. Its just a matter of time.
Poornima
Jay Sun said…
Our prayers are with you...you take care now...
Anonymous said…
Wish you the very best. I am sure you will do fine.
That was beautifully written. I hope all your prayers come true. I know you are going through a difficult time from reading your previous posts. Hope everything works out well for you :)
the mad momma said…
well.. as another married person, i'll echo those below, marriage does need time and immense patience. but i am sure you have looked at all those options. dont let us get you down. that is not the intention. I just hope and pray that only what is right and fit for you happens. God bless...

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