Had to go to Vashi today. Such a struggle to wake up in the morning and rush off. I had thought I would take the bus or train. But i felt fragile and frazzled, so ricked it. Then had a meltdown there. It has been a while since I have felt fury of the kind I had thought I had left behind when I gave up non-veg and liquor. But there it was.
I don't think No Bad Parts should be read without having some kind of support. There is a churn and I am not sure I am capable of handling it. So after a long time, I thought I would look for IFS therapists in Bandra. I don't want to go anywhere else. This also feels like avoidable expense. But let's see if I find something.
Anyway, when we live through something, we grow through something. Or that's what I am telling myself. Here goes all the things I am grateful for:
1. Papa is well. The trip to the doctor was quick and easy.
2. Car wash guy came and I gave him his money. He comes to clean my friend's car every Saturday. I like paying off help on the first. So I was a tad unsettled about the delay but it got done.
3. A friend treated me at Mutthuswamy near Khar station today. Food was quite nice! Then we checked out a few pubs in the area. Khar is hopping! I definitely want to go to Doolally next.
4. Am safe.
5. Have water, electricity, and a home.
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