I know!

You know how, sometimes you see people in miserable situations – good people, smart people, people who should know better – and wonder why they don’t just get out of the pain they’re in? I seldom think of them because it’s unfair and judgmental but more importantly, because…well, it’s more fun to think of myself.

But I think of them in times like this – when I have a toothache. A raging, hard, sore toothache. I know I should go to a dentist. But I can’t. I just can’t. If it were a simple matter of overcoming fear, I suppose I would have tackled it. Sometimes, fear does galvanize one into action. But this is ridiculous. I feel a sloth, a paralysis that just seems insurmountable.

Toothaches should have support groups. I should be able to find someone who I can go to a dentist with. I just can’t bear to go to one by myself. Maybe if someone would accompany me whilst I was kicking and screaming, it would be so much better. Otherwise I have to take a rickshaw by myself, and if I kick and scream in one, they are just going to spread the word amongst all their friends, and no-one’s ever going to be willing to give me a ride ever.

Hmm, maybe I should take a train to a dentist. That way, when I kick and scream, I wouldn’t look so out of place.

Also, I think dentists should make house-calls.

Okay, forget people taking me to the dentist…someone should take me to Kambakht Ishq. I think I’ll LOVE that film! J It looks so happy – everyone looks so jolly and excited – with ache-free teeth. I’d like to see that.

Here’s an idea…what if the famous mystical bird rose from the ashes on a particularly cold day. It was so cold that it actually, ahem, piddled a little. It would be called the ‘Peenix’. Ha ha ha ha ha!

OWW! My tooth! I think this is what I’m getting punished for!