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Irritation and brinjals

I hate this day. I hate it. This morning this dunce of a watchman came and started clanging the gate. I had to move my car because the house opposite to ours is having some kind of a puja. I told him I’d be taking the car out in the next half-hour as I would be leaving for office. He came 15 minutes later and started clanging the gates again. Irritating dunce buffoon constipated donkey with a twisted tail. I yelled at him and told him that he was irritating me. And then he makes these funny eyes and says, “Nahin madam, hum to naukar aadmi hai.” Sappy, on top of that. I told him that he was not naukar aadmi, but he was an irritating aadmi. To which he insisted that no, he was not irritating, but he was a naukar. No-one’s a naukar. They are all irritating and they clang at my gate.

Then I get inside my car and there’s really little fuel. I somehow got it to office. Now I don’t know how I will go back. The only problem with petrol is that it costs money. Why should it cost money? And why should it cost so much? Oh…and brinjals cost a whole lot too. I mean..brinjals! Why should brinjals cost money? It’s not even fuel. Or who knows? It might be. No-one’s tried running a car on mashed brinjal. Or maybe that infernally loud, irritating naukar admi has tried.

I don’t have fuel, I don’t have a parking space today and tomorrow and I don’t have money. Someone needs to feed me a brinjal.

Comments

Serendipity said…
And this too shall pass :P
albeit while you're pushing the car home chewing a burtha :P
Mukta Raut said…
:-) oh...please don't say that...maybe it will rain petrol and some of it will get into the car. How's your day?
skar said…
Why should brinjals cost money? It’s not even fuel.

It is, for the body.

In any case, the reason brinjals cost so much is that they are purple in colour, and hence of royal descent, making them expensive! :p Have you ever peered into the gas tank of your car/bike? What colour is it? DARK PURPLE! :p
anumita said…
Poison costs money and brinjal is poison... so says our yoga guru in office! You wouldnt want to run Bandra on something so lethal.
Come and park at the corner near my house. I have coke, we ll try to run it on that.
Mukta Raut said…
hey anumita! yep...that should do it...or maybe we can use some of that sugarless juice you advocate so much... ha ha ha ha! :-D
Proseaholics said…
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mukta Raut said…
hey kartik....that was a very interesting thought! :-) you and anumita know each other? he he!
skar said…
I think I might've been hit by her brinjal at the brinjal throwing competition organised by the Brinjal Haters Club last week. That brinjal caused some itching on my skin, as if it were poisonous! :p
Puneet said…
I m regular at ur blog, and i find them very insightful, entertaining and sometimes thought provoking.
I know its your blog and you can write whatever you like but I didn't like your blog today. Its ok to get angry at people, but such name-calling does not go down well.
Mukta Raut said…
hey puneet...what can I say? at the time, i felt it was justified.
Unknown said…
hi anumita ... does your office yoga guru really say that brinjal is bad for health? i love brinjal and consume it like a maniac ... :-/ ..fried, grilled, deep fried, with potatoes, grilled and mashed, with peas, anyhow, anyways ... i love it ..
Anonymous said…
Yes omnithere, the old bugger says a lot of things we dont pay heed to. Carry on with your brinjal fiesta, if you have survived so long, you have enslaved the crowned king.
- anumita

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