Saturday, February 05, 2011

My own private cave

I have had it. I have really had it. This world exists to annoy me. I am very sure of this. It waits until I get some sort of method into my life and then it just tilts and swerves and throws everything out of whack. There is so much mess everywhere. Most of the mess comes in the form of people. I detest people. I hate them. They annoy me and they irritate me and then, if that is not enough, they seek to reform me. These little piles of putrid, stinky, hell-hole worthy masses of drama they call 'humans'.

Of the many different forms of torture that a freelancer goes through, interacting with imbeciles is definitely top of the charts. Why will reasonably sane people not understand why I don't have time to step out for a coffee with them? It's not just about money.(Although, it is true that a hundred buck coffee and two hundred buck rickshaw fare tends to get a bit too much for an outing on the whim.) It's also about time and energy. I don't have the wherewithal to stop work, to stop looking for work and writing samples for work and pitching for work, to go and sit and listen to sap about how "he hasn't called yet.' HE clearly is a better judge of how to spend time than I am.

It sounds like a rant. Am I ranting?

So, I now take a deep breath and step away a hundred paces from my existence at this point. I must say that I've had a swell life. There have been good people and stellar friends and a remarkable family. But I have had enough. It's time I take my dusty blue yoga mat and retreat into some benign, restorative darkness where this world will be shut out to me forever.

I want the crowd out. Now.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Relax Mukta. Everything will be fine.
PS: These words obviously won't help, but sometimes, just knowing that somebody - especially a stranger - cares, makes you feel nice. :)